29

Jul

Top Tips for the Best BBQ Ever

If the past few days have been anything to go by, anyone would think summer is here. That’s right – finally. So, make the most of the gorgeous sunshine, high temperatures and good spirit and get a BBQ going with your friends and family. To ensure it goes as best as can be, follow these tips on an illness and hassle-free day:

• If there’s one thing you take from this, ditch the meat and opt for veggies and faux-meats. You don’t want to end with your head down the toilet all night (and let’s face it, the Food Standards Agency said it all with that classic ‘When will I see you again’ pork TV ad they did, remember that?)

• If you are cooking up a plateful of meat, be sure to invite a doctor. You never know who might fall prey to food poisoning (again, the FSA says it all). Don’t forget that with all that saturated fat and cancer-causing slop being consumed, heart attacks and other nasty issues could arise at any moment.

• Soya sausages, ‘chicken‘ fillets and veggie burgers make great BBQ food, but why not spice things up a bit with some sweet-chilli glazed tofu and veg skewered kebobs? Oh and don’t forget lashings of ketchup and supply of beverages!

• Invite some of your meataholic friends (if you’re blessed with them) and give them a burger or hot-dog, waiting to see if they can tell it’s not meat – soooo much fun! Nine times out of ten I best they can’t tell the difference.

• Keep cats, dogs and other companion animals well away from the BBQ. Frazzled tails and burnt noses will just not do. But I’m sure sneaking them a teeny bit of your burger won’t go amiss.

• I hope this goes without saying, but don’t just stick the barby anywhere anyhow. Avoid under trees and too near bushes – the heat will scare your garden wildlife and crispy branches have never been an in look.

Invitations are gratefully accepted. Check out more recipes from the folks at VegCooking.com

Image: Wannaveg / CC


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29

May

Want Ketchup With That Naked Barbequed Human

‘Charred’, naked and erm, human – that’s the only kind of meat I want to see on a barbeque. This brave PETA supporter bared all and jumped on a giant BBQ to give new meaning to National Barbeque Week (26 May – 2 June). Humans and animals have the same parts – flesh, bone, blood – and after all, a corpse is a corpse. The protest took place in Birmingham, Manchester, Liverpool and will also happen in Coventry tomorrow. Mmm PETA-licious… Now back to my original question – ketchup?


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